There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Randomize
