Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
how do flat chested girls get laid?
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I need water and some morals
Randomize
