girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize