its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
