Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize