I'm eating all of the evidence.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize