Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
