That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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