omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
