i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Every concussion has its silver lining
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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