i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Green mimosas i think yes
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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