you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
