Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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