i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
