thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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