elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
We need a shit load of segways right now
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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