id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
my poor anus
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize