dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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