I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
so let's talk penis.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
