remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize
