I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I just want nice things and good sex
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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