It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
