how hairy? two words: wookie tits
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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