so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
i barfeds in our rink
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize