Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
