Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
