Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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