Pregnant stripper...not hot.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
