I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
and you fell through a lawn chair
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
