He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
