dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize