Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
