I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
