im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
