apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize