dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I think this conversation is over.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.