hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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