We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
