I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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