Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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