bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
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All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Even my vagina gasped.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Your cock deserves a montage
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I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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