Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Randomize
