i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
