sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
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it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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