Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
