Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
