Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
