careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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