i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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