I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Randomize
