Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
